God is so gracious to me! He has given me a husband who knows the gospel. A man who trusts in Jesus and knows how to apply truth to our marriage, our conflict, and to the life decisions we make. I could not ask the Lord for anything more in a husband. My husband blows the standard of what I use to think husbands were out of the water. Why? Is it his looks? His talents? His discipline in life? His integrity? His sense of humor? His musical geniousness? No.
These things are like a cherry on top of something greater. Its the character of Christ that I see in him. Its that He holds onto this life loosely and is willing to take risks to trust the Lord through- like raising a support team to make it possible to do college ministry. Like being willing to move into dangerous neighborhoods to relationally share Jesus with people. Its his confidence in the work that Christ has done on the cross for His sin- His total belief in God’s grace and freedom from the bondage of sin and death. Its that he really loves me as Christ loves the church. He is faithful and committed to our growth as Christians, and he is faithful to me. He honors me, serves me, seeks my advice and opinions, is SO thoughtful for me, and is so gracious to me during conflict. Its that he says to me, “My love for you is not conditional. It is not based on how well you do, how much you do, or if you fail, it is based on my committment to you. And nothing will change how committed to you I am.” Who knew men like this exist today? THEY DO!
The greatest dating advice I ever received in the area of dating was this, “Run hard after Jesus and life. Make living for Jesus and giving your life away for others your biggest pursuit. If God wants you to marry, you’ll run into your husband along the way.”
The day I threw my idol of marriage and relationships out the window after I went through some pretty bumpy break-ups and became a Christian and said, “Lord, here I am! I want to serve you and give up my life to follow you. Oh, and if you think its good for me when I’m ready, I would LOVE to marry a missionary!” was the day that the Lord truly began drawing me closer and closer to this rare missionary. In our American culture, its easy to think of missionaries as people who just fly to other countries to share the gospel. Thankfully, God’s idea and purpose for missionaries is so much bigger than this stereotype! All Christians are missionaries and are called to share Jesus in their entire lifestyle. But I didn’t just want to marry someone who said they were a Christian. I wanted to marry someone whose heart and life were actually transformed by the power of God. A man who was laying his life down that others might know this gospel of truth, grace, and freedom. Someone whose values were not of this world or for this world, but of God’s kingdom and eternity. I remember how my desire for my husband changed after I gave my life to Christ. God truly gave met my desires with a man beyond my dreams. Here’s what I got in my missionary husband:
1. A man who does not fear change
2. A man who does not cling to comfort
3. A man who values building up the kingdom of God more than gaining more worldly achievements
4. A man who desires to mentor younger men and seeks counsel from older men
5. A man who treats me like I am a queen (literally! I feel so adored, loved and served by him!)
6. A man who shares about Jesus in a non-threatening, relational and intentional way
7. A man who is slow to anger and quick to repent of sin
8. A man who is quick to forgive others and me!
9. A man who in young, but whom the Lord has given wisdom and knowledge
10. A man who loves to serve others
11. A man who admits his weaknesses
12. A man who stewards his money as though it is not his own, but God’s
13. A man who loves to give his money to support others
14. A man who is a good steward of his body: he eats healthy and exercises
15. A man who loves one woman and is committed to one woman
16. A man who sees the bible as the word of God and who uses it in ALL areas of his life
17. A man who loves others and has compassion
18. A man who would rather take risks that others might know Jesus than to live in his own world of comfort and security
19. A man who never threatens or uses me, but respects me and honors me
20. A man who supports my passions and dreams
21. A man who encourages me to be creative and spontaneous
22. A man who loves my family and brothers a ton!
23. A man who helps around the house just as much as me 
(I know, I know, I’m lucky!)
24. A man who I trust
25. A man who I delight to submit to and follow
26. A man who I can’t wait to be a dad of our kids someday!
27. A man who gives me great advice
28. A man who takes me dancing and plans fun dates!
29. A man who could be a professional listener
30. A man who leads me closer to God and encourages me as I grow in Christ’s character
Thank you, God, for giving me Nick!!
So awesome! What a gift it is that there are still such godly men in this world. Thanks for encouraging us other girls to wait for the right man who loves God!
This was very encouraging to me. I think I googled some key words and found this. I believe I found my future husband, and he believes he found me, but he lives in Florida and I live in Canada, and we havent even met in person yet! We do skype and IM’s except now that we fell in love with each other, it is time for him to go back to school. He is going to school to get this certificate with his church, to prepare for ministry but they are not allowed to date. We are already in love and so the solution to that for him to keep his eyes on God and not be distracted by me, and to maintain the fast from seeking love other than God’s, is to stop talking completely for the ten months of this school year. This is pretty much torture, and I am trying so hard to keep my eyes on the throne, but it is so hard! It was our first day not talking all day today, and Ive barely eaten at all. This is why your message encouraged me, because it reminded me that my man is worth waiting for, and I will wait for him. His character and love for God above all else and love for me is like nothing I have ever experienced in a person! I am just praying and praying and praying. Thank you for this blog. : ) <3