There’s no other way to say it. I’m just so happy I could BURST ya’ll! If you’re one of those peeps who knows me REALLY well, then you know its been a real fight to experience some solid joy over the past five months due to some circumstancial meltdowns in my life. And that is REALLY a long story made short. Perhaps the long story will make its way to the blog soon. For now, clap your hands with me and REJOICE in God’s faithfulness! OH how GOOD he is!!
WANT TO KNOW WHY??
His mercy. His steadfast love. The way He does what is IMPOSSIBLE and CHANGES me! Oh yea, AND He just created me to LOVE music and to be stirred to love Him more through it. Amen! I am doing something that stirs my affections for God more than any other thing in my life! I have been writing so much music my apartment could explode with lyrics that NEVER could have been produced had the Lord not taken me through some of life’s greatest challenges I’ve yet experienced at this ripe age of twenty-four. I am recording some songs that are undoubtedly the most raw, human, and soulful songs my heart has ever written. Who would have imagined I’d have to fall on my face SO many times to write from such a raw, real and vulnerable place in me? Seeing God carry me through so much askjkfjasdnfkasmfakmkaj…. thats just what it feels like to describe the past year of my life… is just unspeakably satisfying and amazing. And it is SO worth singing about.
I bet my entire life on the belief that Jesus Christ offers the MOST freedom and joy that can be found above ANY other thing on the face of this earth. The reality of how he holds me, loves me, and does not condemn me is just bouncing around in my soul. I long for others to feel this total unabandoned love.
Tonight, I say to you, whoever you are, my dear reader, my fellow seeker of happiness in life, that Jesus Christ is worth surrendering to. He is worth CRYING to and POURING OUT YOUR HEART TO. No matter HOW old you are. No matter WHAT you are going through. He doesn’t want a “better” you. He just wants the REAL you.
Oh, my friend. Do not lose heart. Don’t give up. Don’t worry about being better. Just allow yourself to be honest and real, allow yourself to cry. Allow yourself to be held and welcomed in the reality of Jesus. Don’t lose another second of enjoying this MERCIFUL, GENTLE, PATIENT God!! (no, I promise this isn’t a thirty second “sticker for Jesus” advertisement.) This is the most sincere way I can think of loving you. Its like sharing my lottery money with everyone I know. But its better! Its the real, true and alive God who is in a deeply intimate relationship with His beloved children.
I am going to figure out a way to post one of my songs to this blog in the near future…
I’ll let you have a listen soon. 
Whatever you LOVE doing the most, seriously, take a day off of being an American who gets TOO many things done and then still has more to do and… remember what that one lost passion is. Just do what you LOVE doing more than anything else… chances are God has given YOU a passion that stirs your heart to love him more too… and chances are that He wants to USE this wisely designed gift of yours for His kingdom… you think? I think God is a dreamer WAY more than we earthly folk are.
So what plans can you cancel in order to creatively worship God?
Or if your the planner type, what can you pencil in somewhere in the midst of it all to get some affections for God flowing?
Don’t be afraid to ask God to show you what you love. But mostly, don’t be afraid to BE loved. To fall and to be held. This is where we begin to rise into the person that God has created us to be. What if we could be what God intended us to be to the fullest? Not in an obsessed with productivity way, but in an obsessed with BEING way… to just BE! aaa… that sounds nice.
To rest in a deeply contented, satisfied identity in Christ. Yes, God, make this real for me and for all who seek you!
I can truly see God in your heart! you have so much joy in you… Where can we hear your music? Your posts are inspiring. =)